When you announced that you were expecting again, you got some very surprised reactions. Some people said you must be crazy having them so close together. How will you even manage with a second baby?
I know you’re tired — so tired that some days you wonder how you’ll get through. Last night you were up with your teething baby who still doesn’t like to sleep in his crib. You rocked him back to sleep three times despite the fact that your back hurts and your growing belly doesn’t allow for much room anymore. You lie back in bed and wonder how you’ll get up the next morning.
Up at 6 a.m., you catch a glimpse of your dark under eye circles in the mirror and wonder: What is this pregnancy glow everyone talks about? You quickly drink your morning coffee and put your son in his high chair with breakfast so you can clean up from the night before. When nighttime comes again, you wonder how you’ll manage the next day.
At the grocery store in line with your 11-month-old and your apparent big belly, you get a handful of stares. The lady behind you in line makes a comment about how full your hands will be. Later on, your friends will ask you out, but you are way too tired to join. Feeling nauseous and thinking about all the things that need to be done, you wonder how you’ll manage.
Your due date is approaching and you look at your son with love. Your first baby, the one who made you a mother. The one who changed you in so many ways but all for the better. The one who made all the back aches and sleepless nights worth it. The one who showed you what true unconditional love is, and you wonder: How will I ever love another this way?
The day your second baby is placed in your arms, you will look at her with the same big love. Your eyes will fill up with tears of happiness the same way they did a year ago. Your heart will grow another 10 sizes, and you’ll wonder how you even questioned how you’d love another.
Your hands will be full. More full than they have ever been before, but so will your heart. You think you’ve got a lot to figure out, like how you’ll make it through the newborn stage all over again. It will all fall into place despite all the things you’re thinking.
There will be amazing days when you get to see your babies smile at each other. There will be days when they’re simultaneously crying and you want to pull out your hair. No one has it all figured out. This motherhood thing is the most beautiful, hard, amazing, challenging but most rewarding job there is.
If you’re lucky enough to have multiple little ones who love you, remind yourself of this during the chaos, on the days you just want a break and wonder how you’ll manage: You’re doing a fantastic job, and you will always, always make it.